Navigating the court system when you're supported by legal representation is exhausting, even more so if you are having to hybrid or completely self represent. No matter how confident we might be in our every day lives, being in a court building and court room can be an intimidating experience. Particularly if you've had no experience with the law system before.
You are also there to represent your children's voices against seemingly insurmountable challenges such as your ex partner's behaviour, solo parenting, co parenting with a partner who doesn't want to co parent, financial difficulties, mental health challenges...we are all battling on the frontline for our story to be heard.
It's important to remember that you are not alone.
Before a court hearing, if you're feeling overwhelmed, see if one of our recommended tools can bring you back to ground.
You know your story. This is your voice. The court has a duty to hear you.
Find your footing when the legal process feels overwhelming and chaotic. It takes a huge amount of courage and resilience to start and then continue this court journey, it's okay to step back now and then to regather and reconnect with yourself.
Self advocacy and power help you find your voice in a system that tends to drown it out. By tapping into your inner strength and remaining true to your convictions, you can succeed. Sometimes we all need a role model or two to remind us that we are also on a journey and have the power to change our story.
Knowing that there is a fight for equality and systemic change can remind us that your personal fight is part of the larger mission of achieving justice for all women. You are not alone. There are so many women who can share in your story, sometimes we just need to hear their voices.
'But when I got angry, my nerves sought an outlet, and my mouth didn't always guard the gates.'
N. K. Jemisin (2010). “The Broken Kingdoms”, p.16, Hachette UK
'Children do learn what they live. Then they grow up to live what they've learned.'
Children Learn What They Live: Parenting to Inspire Values". Book by Dorothy Nolte and Rachel Harris, January 5, 1998.
'Courage is more exhilarating than fear and in the long run it is easier. We do not have to become heroes overnight. Just one step at a time, meeting each thing that comes up, seeing it is not as dreadful as it appeared, discovering we have the strength to stare it down'
Eleanor Roosevelt, U.S. delegate to the United Nations General Assembly
'I raise up my voice, not so that I can shout, but so that those without a voice can be heard.'
Malala Yousafzai, Pakistani female education activist, and producer of film and television. She is the youngest Nobel Prize laureate in history.
'When we are silent, we are still afraid. So it is better to speak.'
Audre Lorde, American writer, professor, philosopher, intersectional feminist, poet and civil rights activist.
'I learned a long time ago the wisest thing I can do is be on my own side, be an advocate for myself.'
Maya Angelou, American memoirist, poet, and civil rights activist.